Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
