Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize