I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
