Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
