I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
