Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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