who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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