so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
