You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
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i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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