yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
