im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
