and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
