he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
