yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
