My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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