Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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