um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize