Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
