All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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