sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize