4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
