wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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