no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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