So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
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She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
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girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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