I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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