Kiss
Puke
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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