You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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