Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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