Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
