is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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