Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
