real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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