You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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