"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
