I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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