Hey man sorry I got all grabby
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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