Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
