Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I believe in your delicious
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
