I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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