come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Randomize
