i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
