I swear she didn't look like that last week.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Randomize
