YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
