Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She's the barista slut.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
