Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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