woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
