hell yes lets make some ravioli
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
