God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I broke a rule
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.