what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
