I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Tornado booty call.. dedication
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
